Pray for TJ

I am close to being able to be totally transparent regarding the heartache we have experienced in this last year with our oldest son, TJ.  I've been given an assignment that I have not wanted and yet I approach that assignment with all my heart, soul, and mind to pass with flying colors.  It's an assignment that can only be passed with the help of the Lord.  He is certainly faithful!

The Sunday before Christmas my husband and I stood before our church family because there was a huge elephant in the room.  The day before, our son made the front page of the local paper and two news stations in Columbus, Ohio.  We were several days into knowing what was going on, but had hoped that it would not be made public.  Not so.  It was the assignment we were given. 

The same day the news hit the front page I got an email from Carol Kent.  She new that we would be going before our church family and offered some godly encouragment.  She said, "Kathy, when we are vulnerable before the people of God, they respond with love and compassion."

I can't recall what Tom said, but I know exactly what I said.  I said, "There are many questions we do not have the answers to today.  So we rest in the things that we do know.  We know that we love TJ very much.  We know we are committed to him as long as we live on this earth.  We know that God loves him even more than we do.  We kow that God began a good work in him over 19 years ago and He will be faithful to complete that good work.  We know that Tom and I stand together strong with the help of the Lord.  We know we have a church family that loves TJ and loves us.  Thank you for praying for him and for us."

Our church has been wonderful through these times.  What a blessing. 
I'll share more soon.  Thanks for your love and compassion.  Pray for TJ.  God wins when it is all said and done.  We anticipate a great victory!

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas!  2010 is nearly behind us and can I just say, "I am looking forward to 2011!  It has been a year of much joy and many heartaches.  I am grateful to know a God that cares and loves not only each member of my family, but myself included.  2010 has been the year that I can say with resounding joy.....I can not imagine walking this earth without the Lord!

I'll start with the girls and move my way up.  First, we had an amazing opportunity to visit China in March of this year.  You can check out our journey by clicking on the tab at the top of this blog.  TJ was unable to go with us as we journeyed for 21 days through China, visiting many historical places.  The highlight of the trip was being able to visit the birthplaces of our youngest children, Lily and Sarah.  Check out the travel blog if you are interested in more details!

Sarah turned six in July.  She is in the first grade at Fairfield Christian Academy.  She is extremely bright.  Miss. Cassidy says that she is extremely quiet throughout the day.  I have reminded her that Sarah is not that quiet at home...especially when she is mad!  Sarah continues to play the violin, but her greatest love is reading, writing and art.  She says, "I will be an artist when I am older."  She draws much of her time when she is not in school.  Sarah and Lily are both taking dance through Leaps of Faith.....learning to praise God through the art of dance.  Sports?  We are venturing into that territory now as Lily and Sarah are both playing Upward basketball.  Dane and I are the coaches of their team!

Lily turned 7 last month.  She is also in the first grade at Fairfield Christian Academy.  I don't know a more pleasant child than our Lily!  She is a pretty easy-going little girl and her girliness brings a smile to my face most every day!  Like Sarah, she loves to read.  But when home, Lily seems to like to track down her blanket and cuddle up and suck her thumb.  We have begun talks about when it is the right time to give up the blankee.  She only sucks her thumb when she has the blankee!  One day!  Lily learned to ride a two-wheeler this year so that was a big milestone.  Lily plays the violin as well....and loves to have Daddy teach her on the piano.  Tom says that she is giftend musically.   I trust his opinion!

Dane will be 15 in February!  What a guy!  He has one of the best hearts I've seen in a young man!  He is a wonderful big brother and a great help to me.  He is in the ninth grade at Fairfield Christian Academy.  He played on the golf team this year.  He is also part of the choir.  And I think he got a role in the musical this year.  He, too, is gifted musically.  He is also a good student and works extremely hard academically.  Oh...and does he have a sense of humor!  He cracks me up!

Ty is completing his senior year at Fairfield Christian Academy.  He does well academically as well.  He played on the golf team again this year.  He qualified for the second time in his high school career!  The best part is that the FCA Knights golf team made it to state as a team.  They placed fourth in the state of Ohio!  Ty has taken up rock climbing and repelling......an interest that has me a bit anxious.  I find some comfort in knowing that he is a smart guy and is doing these things with good kids that I hope are also smart guys!  We haven't confirmed anything, but it is looking like Ty will end up at Mt. Vernon Nazerene University next year. 

TJ graduated from high school this past year!  Right now he is working through some things that are certainly a challenge.  We stand strong in knowing that God began a great work in TJ and will be faithful to completion!  I look forward to seeing how God moves in his life in the coming years!  I know it is going to be something big!  And I look forward to celebrating with him and sharing the story as it unfolds. 

I have had some changes this year as well.  I no longer work for the Fairfield County Board of Developmental Disabilities.  I took a few months off and have been subbing in local schools here in town.  When the new years starts, I hope to find something fulltime that is agreeable with being a mom to five and wife to a pastor!  We'll see!  I have had a difficult year with some back issues and am hoping 2011 is a better year on that level.  I continue to teach a Women's study through our church and count the women in my group as some of the best friends ever!  I am enjoying serving on two ministry boards that mean a lot to me....Grace Haven Place and Orphan Voice.  Grace Haven Place is a home here in town that houses women who are transitioning from jail into the community.  It is a home of faith.....filled with grace for women who certainly need and know the grace of a loving, forgiving Father.  Orphan Voice is a ministry near and dear to my heart.  OV serves the widows, orphans and poor of Central Vietnam.

Tom continues to serve as the Lead Minister of the Lancaster Campus of Fairfield Christian Church.  He is still involved with the worship aspect of the church as well.  I have a great deal of respect for the pastor Tom has been over these past few years.  I even have more appreciation for the father he has been to our five kids!  He's a wonderful dad!

I know this is just a brief update for those who may have received our Christmas card.  Since I listed the blog address, I just wanted to write a little update.  Thanks for checking in!  Thanking God for being so evident in our lives this past year!  We are looking forward to seeing His plans unfold for 2011.  May you be blessed in big and mighty ways by Him!

One day........

First, let me say to anyone who might still look at my blog from time to time....sorry I have been so negligent!  We have had an on-going crisis in our life that tends to take up a lot of my time and sometimes I am just fortunate to get the necessary things done.  One day I look forward to sharing publicly some of the things we have been experiencing regarding this crisis!  One day, there will be a victory and testimony that we will allow us to share more openly.  Praying that victory is soon!  In the meantime, we welcome the prayers!

One day this crib was the sleeping place of a little girl named Yang Xiao Jing.  The orphanage staff called this little girl "Jing Jing."  Jing Jing was found at the gate of that orphanage in Yangjiang on the estimated date of her birth, November 17, 2003.  For the next 11 1/2 months the Yangjiang Social Welfare Institute was her temporary home.  The crib was her crib for part of that time.  The photo in the crib is an earlier picture of Jing Jing.

Jing Jing no longer lives there.  In fact, she is no longer "Jing Jing."  One day God opened the door for Tom and I to travel to China to take Jing Jing out of that crib, out of that orphanage.  She is now Lily Kathrine Xiao Jing Alexander!  She has taken up residence in our hearts and in our home.  She has a forever family that can not imagine life without her!  She also has a much more comfortable bed that is so comfortable that there are many mornings it is difficult to get her out of it! 

This month has been an important month!  It was November 1 that we celebrated her "Gotcha Day."  It was on November 1, 2004 that we first got to hold Lily!  It was less than two weeks later that she got to meet her three brothers!  And just a few days after returning home with her, we celebrated her first birthday, November 17, 2004.  So, soon we will celebrate her seventh birthday!

November is also National Adoption Awareness Month.  Many children sleep in beds around that world and do not know the comfort of a bed in a home with a forever family.  That shouldn't be!  I'm glad there is a month to bring awareness to adoption.  I wish we could empty all of those orphan beds!

One day.

Harold Miller Invitational

As some of you may know, Ty plays golf.  Well, that is an understatement!  He loves the game.  For the past two summers, Ty would golf anywhere from 5-6 days per week!  I can't complain......I know where he is and what he is doing!

The Fairfield Christian Academy has an exceptional golf team this year.  They played this past Saturday in the Harold Miller Invitational.  Seven teams.  I'm not sure where Ty placed, maybe 5th or sixth overall, but the team won!  Not only did they win, but the guys all shot 81 or better!

They have sectionals this Tuesday!  Ty is the one in the middle holding the team trophy.

Go Knights!

Golf and Planes

Dane

Ty

Kyle and Ty

Lily on the plane

Sarah on the plane with Cassie

Both Dane and Ty are playing golf for Fairfield Christian Academy.  After years and years of football, basketball and baseball.....this is the only sport left!  I must say that it is much different to be a fan watching golf than the other sports.  First, you have to be quiet unless there is a great shot...then clapping is appropriate.  Second, you have to stay so far away and you can't speak to the golfers.  This is good because I don't know anything about golf unlike the other sports where I have things to say from time to time!  Third, it is one of the only sports where you get a workout by watching!  I do enjoy walking the course WHEN I do not have the girls with me....great walk!  When the girls are with me I am slightly miserable and would be rich if I had a nickle for every time I said, "Shhhhh!"  Dane is on the JV team this year.  Ty golfs in the number two spot for the team.  One of the photos is with Kyle, the number one guy.  Both Kyle and Ty made it to state last year.  If all goes well, the Knights will send their entire team to state this year!  So far Ty has had some great games.  Such is the game of golf, he has had a few not so good days!  One of the more exciting ones was where he shot a 34, two under par at a match at Valley View.  On the ninth hole he pitched it in for an eagle!  One of those "you are allowed to clap" moments!

One Sunday our small group met at a hangar at the local airport.  One of our group members has a small plane.  We had a great picnic and everyone was given the opportunity to go up in the plane and get a birdseye view of Lancaster, Ohio!  I passed as I only get on planes to travel to destinations and not for enjoyment!  Tom took Lily up and our friend Cassie took Sarah up.  I did drive the golf cart around the airport!

First Day of School

Dane, Sarah, Lily and Ty on the first day of school!

Ty on the first day of his FINAL year of school!

Dane is way too cool for the ninth grade!

Lily at her desk in Mrs. Neff's class.

                                                     Sarah at her desk in Miss. Cassidy's class.

The 2010-11 school year began on August 23rd.  I haven't had a working computer in a while so I am late getting things posted.  The girls were excited to start the first grade at Fairfield Christian Academy.  Both of the girls were thrilled with the teacher they were assigned to this year.

Dane is a freshmen....yikes!  Tyler is starting his senior year....double yikes!

I have subbed a few days at their school so I get to see them on occasion....which is fun!

Fat Cat

Well, Sugar Bears Pizza is my favorite pizza in town, but they weren't open on the day of my birthday so we went to my next favorite..Fat Cat's!  As a kid, my dad always called me, "Fat Kat the water rat."  So, it was fun to think of my dad on my birthday!

Tom and Ty's trip to the White Mountains

As some may know, Tom and Ty love to do some serious hiking.  When Ty was 12 they hiked 70 miles of the Appalachian Trail through the Smokey Mountains.  They have done some other hikes along the way, but that was the big one.....six days, five nights.  This was their second big one.  Only this time they headed east to the White Mountains of New Hampshire.  I don't know the miles, but the trip was cut short to four days. They camped in some primitive spots and saw a lot a great views.  Sadly, due to Tom spraining his ankle, they did not climb Mt. Washington like they had hoped.  No regrets though....it was a great time for both of them.  I love that Tom and Ty have this sort of time together.  It will make for great memories for Ty!  Ty talked Tom into driving through New York City on the way home!  They didn't even get out of the car, but they saw Lady Liberty, Central Park, Ground Zero the Empire State Building (I think.)

Glad to have my mountain men home!

Guangdong Reunion

Hannah and Lily

Lily, Hannah and Chloe.....November 2004

Red Couch Photo of 2004

Chloe, Hannah and Lily.  There were over 60 cribs in the Yangjiang SWI.  Our nine girls were spread throughout that room, but these three were cribmates!  Hannah was in the crib between Lily and Chloe.  Having been there twice, I'm thinking they probably rolled into each others cribs from time to time!

(See photo above from 2004)

Our lame attempt at re-enacting the red couch photo.  Left to right front row:  Chloe L, Lilianna, Lily, Jasmine, Joy, Chloe C.  Left to right back row: Ruthie, Kendall, Rylie and Hannah

(See Red Couch Photo from 2004 above)

This is a photo of the girls and the siblings that came along for the reunion.  Let's see...four siblings from China, one sibling from Ethiopia and four made in the USA.

Slow boat from China!

Lily giving Hannah a hug goodbye...well, it was one of many hugs goodbye!

This is Lily with Hannah and Joy

Every year we have a reunion with the families that travelled to China together to adopt in 2004...Lily's adoption.  Twelve families spent over two weeks together touring Beijing prior to travelling to Guangdong Province to recieve our girls.  The twelve girls met their families on November 1st, 2004.  Nine of the girls were from Yangjiang SWI and the other three were from...oops...can't remember that name.  We spent most of our trip at the White Swan on the seventh floor. 

It has been exciting to see the girls together!  It takes a few minutes for the girls to warm up to each other, but then they act like they have been friends on a daily basis!  I am really enjoying seeing these relationships continue.  Tom and I enjoy the fellowship with the adults that became friends through this special connection.  We share many stories from our travel days.

It is also exciting to see how the families change from year to year!  Some continue to add new family members!

Guangdong Families....we love you!  See you next year!

Happy Birthday, Sarah!

Sarah turned six on July 7th.  We really wanted to avoid any real party so I offered her a day with a few friends.  She decided that she wanted to go to the Baltimore Pool.  She invited Anagrace and Gwen....of course, Lily gets to go as well as Gwen's sisters Megan and Lyndon.  And with Megan, Lyndon and Gwen came Lorissa....my friend.  I'll spare the pictures of Lorissa and I!  After a day of swimming, I took the girls to McDonald's for dinner.

Tom was out of town on the seventh, so we had her cake the night before.  I know....lame cake!  She did enjoy the scooter she got from us!  And she really enjoyed spending birthday money from Grandma!  Happy Birthday, Sarah Jo!

The Pledge by Lily Alexander (pause song at the bottom before you play it)

Lily was only three years old when we recorded this, but it seems appropriate for a day like today!

Three P's......party, park and parade!

Ty's golfer's tan!

While at the park, we painted nails!  Yeah, well....I don't do pink!

I didn't get many pics at TJ's graduation party...this is the display of photos.

Day at the park...Sarah trying to whistle!

Lily at the park...trying to whistle!

Just the three of us at a picnic at the park.  They wanted to go swimming but the weather was way to nice to spend swimming!

Waiting with the Payne family...for the Lancaster parade.

Who wears yellow on their children for the Fourth of July parade?  I guess I do!

Gotta read this!

The Geise family showed up at the Adoption Fair at our church several years ago thinking God was calling them to adopt from China.  On that day, God made it clear that it was actually Ethiopia.  Through that process, God has called them to move to Ethiopia..........an amazing read....read it!

Father's Day......a new home office for Tom!

Today was Father's Day.  We weren't sure what to get Tom for Father's Day.  He hates to have us spend much money on him so I knew we had to keep it simple.  He had some suggestions, but none of them hit me as much as the idea that I had!

First, I consider myself extremely blessed to have Tom as the father to my kids!  I have always considered him to be the best person I know.....and he hates when I say that....because he is also the most humble person I know!  This last year has been a challenging year for us in terms of parenting.  When I have been weak, he has been strong!  When I have emotional, he has been together!  When I have been angry, he had the voice of reason!  When I wanted to react, he helped me find restraint!  When I didn't know if I could love enough, he loved enough for both of us!  When I wanted to shut down, he stepped it up and showed up!  He has helped me be a better parent in some tough times!  I so love and respect him for who he has been...especially this last year!

Through this, we've also gone through some serious transitions with our church.  Tom served as the interim lead pastor during a tough transition.  When many would have wanted to run, he stayed!  He stayed because God called him to stay!  I'm so grateful to have a guy that seriously seeks the heart of God in all that he does!

He was recently called to be the Lead Minister at our church.  For twelve years he has served as the Worship Pastor and now he preaches just about every Sunday. Quite honestly, I enjoy his messages.  I have the privilige of hearing them several times each week as he prepares!  There are seven of us living in this 3-bedroom home.  Every space is taken up by either a person or the belongings of a person!  We don't have an office or den as a place to get away to read and/or study.  Tom has made the front porch a place where he reads, studies and prepares for Sunday mornings.  For several months now I have complained that our front porch looks like a bit of a Hillbilly porch!  The old ladderback chair looked cool, but wasn't comfortable for reading.  So he used it as a table and sat in a lawn chair.  Many mornings he sits there with his Bible, an assortment of other books and his laptop.  There are the occasional days where it is the newspaper!  On many Sunday mornings, if a neighbor would be out, they would probably hear in the distance the sermon that would be given later that morning at our church!  Many Sunday mornings, I get to hear it as I contemplate getting out of bed and getting ready for the day!  I admire this in him and consider it am blessed at seeing and hearing his heart....coming from the front porch!

So the girls and I set out to shop on Saturday morning!  Lily is proud to say, "We got daddy a new home office!"  It's a simple chair and a simple table sitting on a simple porch!  I'm glad it doesn't have that hillbilly look!  So, maybe one day he will have some fancy office where he can bring his hundreds of books out of the basement and placed on fancy bookshelves.  Until then, his front porch home office will do....Happy Father's Day, Tom! I like the view of the front porch when you are sitting there!

GRADUATION PARTY!

You are invited to TJ's graduation party!

Saturday, June 26

4:00 p.m. - 7:00 p.m.

The Chapel

Fairfield Christian Church

1965 N. Columbus St.

Lancaster, Ohio  43130

(Park in the corner lot of Whittier and Columbus and enter Door H)

I guess the tooth fairy is visiting our house tonight!

It is a momentous occasion in our home as Lily lost her first tooth today!  This tooth has been hanging around way too long!  Quite honestly, you would think after having experienced three kids who have lost many teeth over the years, you'd think I wouldn't be so wimpy...but I hate the look of a loose tooth!  I do have an issue with some of the folks out there that "represent" the tooth fairy!  Lily says, "Mom, the kids in my class got $10.00 from the tooth fairy when they lost their first tooth."  My response, "Lily, I don't think that tooth fairy knows our family."  She follows that up with, "Well, I hope the tooth fairy that knows us can leave me a dollar and a quarter."  Personally, I still think that is a bit much for a tooth, but I'm thinking our tooth fairy can deliver a buck twenty five!  That's a first tooth deal only!  The bummer part is that the tooth fairy is really tired and wants to go to bed, but I still hear voices coming from behind their bedroom door!  Hope they sleep soon because I would hate for the tooth fairy to fall asleep and skip out on her duties!  Wouldn't that be heartbreaking for such a momentous occasion!

One down, four to go!!!!!

TJ receiving his diploma!

TJ was hugged by three of the principals.

TJ with Grandma Flo (My mom)

TJ with Grandma and Grandpa Alexander (Tom's Parents)

TJ with Tom and I

Well, he did it!  TJ graduated from high school this past Sunday!  We were excited...and proud!  We will be having a graduation party on June 26th.....more information coming on that at a later date!  What's next for TJ?  On Monday morning he started a full-time job with a local concrete company.  We are proud of you, TJ!