Build-A-Bear Trip

The long-awaited trip to Build-A-Bear finally came today! Sarah is not one to watch much television. This is a good thing...except when I need to get something done and need a temporary diversion! The only thing she really loves to watch on television is her DVD of "Big Bird in China." We have been talking about going to Build-A-Bear for some time. Our good friend Kathi Gilmore has been in town and she wanted to treat the girls to this building experience. Sarah absolutely loved getting her Big Bird! Lily enjoyed the building process, too! She now has a new friend that she has named "Barkley." When we returned, big brother Dane was reading to the girls so I'm including that as well.

Hunting, a birthday and a post-placement

Well, I can't say that hunting has been something I have given much thought to....until the boys got to be a bit older. No one in my family ever hunted so I didn't know much about it. No one hunted in Tom's family either...unless you count killing those pesty groudhogs that invaded the crops every year...they were fair game. I took the boys to a hunter education course several years ago down at Anglers Paradise. I made sure to remind the boys that their mom scored higher on the exam than both of them! As interested as they were in hunting, we just never made connections for them to actually go. Our church started a new outreach this year focusing on several outdoor adventures. We allowed all three of them to go. The first meeting was target shooting. I knew they were in safe hands with this bunch of guys. They paired up the boys with a seasoned hunter for the youth day only deer days. I was out of town visiting friends in Charlotte when I got the first call from Tyler. He was 90 yards out and shot his first buck...a seven point. He was pretty psyched. Me? Well, I was just wondering how I was going to cook venicen. TJ was excited for his brother, but disappointed that he didn't get one. Dane took a shot at one, but missed. I was surprised that TJ decided to miss the Ohio State/Michigan game in order to take one more try at getting his first deer. Well, he got an eight point! He was excited, too! Me? I'm checking out recipes on the internet. Anyone wanting to come to dinner in the next year....BEWARE!!!

On another note, Tyler turned 14 today! Fourteen years ago I found myself overdue and rather uncomfortable. I settled in for what I thought was going to be another weekend of waiting. That Friday night I was enjoying a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (with a glass of milk) when I felt something start to happen. I told Tom that I thought it was time. I called the doctor and he recommended that I wait until morning. Tom decided he would just go on to bed. Within the hour I got Tom out of bed and was at the hospital. I went through six hours of labor and an emergency c-section at 6:00 a.m. to welcome....Tyler Dean Alexander! Happy Birthday, Ty!

And finally, we had our six-month post-placement with our Social Worker today. I can hardly believe that it has been six months since we got our hands on Sarah! It seems like we've had her much longer than that. She is truly a joy. She has come a long way since we first came home. I remember the first few weeks she would often look down and fiddle with her fingers as if she was so shy. Well, shy she isn't!

Photos: The one of Tyler is this years (8th grade) photo from school. I've included a picture of the boys with their catches from deer hunting on Saturday.

Noodles and Tea

Well, the girls enjoy sitting down for a little of their favorites....noodles and tea. When things get crazy and I want a quiet moment, it seems like tea time works!

Lily's Celebration of turning three years old!

We had some friends over tonight for a rather informal celebration of Lily turning three. Her birthday is actually this Friday, the 17th, but we have some plans and couldn't schedule a celebration this weekend.

It is amazing to see how much Lily has changed in the two years that we have had her! She brings a great deal of joy to our family. We don't have family close so it is nice to have good friends to share in celebrations like this.

Tonight we looked at pictures of the boys when they were all three years old. It seems like yesterday. We really only have them for a short time, don't we? We are a blessed family.

Jesus Loves Me...sung by Lily

We celebrated Lily's third birthday tonight. After most of our guests left, she allowed me to video tape her singing "Jesus Loves Me." Enjoy.

Lily's Haircut

I created a Slide Show! Check it out!

I'm just practicing with this program and thought I'd see how it turns out. These are more photos of our night going Trick or Treating.

Kathy

What a difference two years will make!

Two years ago today we sat in a room with 12 other couples who would be getting their little girls at the same time that we got ours....our Gotcha Day for Lily! It was not a huge fanfare by any means, but a moment that will never be forgotten by either Tom or I. The process of adopting from a foriegn country is an interesting journey. What begins with chasing paper after paper to add to a dossier eventually leads to a referral. The difficult part of the journey is when you know the facts about your little girl..her looks, her birthdate, her location, her size...and yet you can't touch her or hold her. That was a long eight weeks! The room we were in was too small for so many people considering everyone had a camera, video camera and bags! At the moment they handed Lily to us....no one else existed in that room! That was our mement! We celebrate that day today! We love you, Lily!

A Cat, A Dog, a Headless Man and plenty of Candy

Yes, I know I have more children then these two girls! TJ wasn't allowed to go trick-or-treating because I believe if you shave, you shouldn't be out there getting candy. He got the job of passing out the candy at our house. There is a picture of him doing his job posted above. He is wearing the Ohio State hat. (GO BUCKS!!!) Tyler didn't get to go either...even though he doesn't shave yet. I did let him walk around with his buddies though. Dane got to go, but he took off with friends and I never did get a picture of him dressed as Elvis. Lily was a beautiful cat and Sarah was a dog that refused to wear her tail or his ears. They enjoyed going to several houses saying "Trick or Treat" followed by a "Thank you."

Most of these pictures are of the girls. One of the pictures includes a deacon at our church....Scott. He is the headless man! We consider he and his wife Brenda to be good friends, although we may have a difficult time convincing the girls to go back there. Some of the pictures include our friend, Sue Johnson. Sue has three children that were able to take off on their own so she decided to help this one-armed mom with the girls. Thanks, Sue. Sue used to live really close to us, but moved recently. We miss them a lot even though they are just across town. It isn't all bad, the headless man bought their old house!

I promise to post photos of my boys soon!

Five kids, a party and a sling

We finally got around to getting photos done on the family and the five kids. I have posted one of them...aren't they beautiful?!

The five are doing well. TJ finished up his football season. At the last game he scored three touchdowns and a 2-point conversion. It was a fun game to watch. He is getting ready to start basketball. His grades are coming out this week. He is bummed because he is getting a "C+" in history which means "no drivers liscense yet." I'm not opposed to "C's" by any means....as long as I see a strong effort...which we haven't seen. Ty finished up the golf season and has already started basketball conditioning. He was really stressed about a possible "B+" on his report card! He needs to chill a bit on that. Dane is almost done with flag football and has basketball tryouts this weekend. His grades are looking pretty good, too.

The girls? Well, Sarah continues to bite Lily. I'm really at a loss as to what to do...shy of biting her back. The good news is that the girls are potty trained! The girls are a lot of work, but bring a good bit of joy to this crew. We took them to a birthday party for their friend, Sydney. After the party we took the kids trick-or-treating in the neighborhood. The other posted picture is of the kids at the party. Yes, all of them were born in China and adopted by friends of ours. Aren't they a cute bunch? Lily was a cat and Sarah was a dog, but neither of them had their ears on for the photo.

As for the sling...I'm the one wearing one. Last week I picked the girls up at the same time and didn't follow the general rule of "bending at the knees before lifting." Turns out that the snapping sound in my shoulder was an A-C joint injury....shoulder separation. The reality of getting older has hit hard! I have a little more than one week in the sling and then two months of no lifting. How do I do that with two toddlers? Not very well!

If you are reading this post, know that The Seven Alexanders send blessings your way.

The Seventh Alexander

Scroll down a few posts and hear about Sarah XiaoNing Alexander....the Seventh Alexander!

The Sixth Alexander

I had written about the Sixth Alexander before my last post but saved it to finish at a later date. I posted it tonight, but blogger-powers-that-be put it in the order of when I first started writing it. Please scroll down and read what I have to say about our Lily Kathrine XiaoJing Alexander!

The Seventh Alexander

This is our Gotcha Day Photo

This is the first photo we looked at of Sarah!

Little did we know while we were in CHina picking up Lily, there was a four-month old little girl a few hundred miles away that was the Seventh Alexander!

Min Xiao Ning was found on the #2 bridge known as "The Forever Wishes Bridge" in Qinzhou CIty (Chin-jo) on July 8, 2004. The note attached to her said that she was born the previous day, July 7th. Qinzhou City is located in the southern part of Guangxi Province near Vietnam. The man that found her took her to the local police station. The police then took her to Qinzhou City Social Welfare Institute where they gave her the name Min Xiao Ning. "Min" is the surname given to all babies that come to this particular orphanage. "Xiao" although pronouned the same as Lily's given Chinese name, means "dawn/morning." "Ning" means "peaceful." The orphanage found Xiao Ning to have a congentital heart defect known as ventricular septal defect (VSD). Due to this special need, they transferred her to A Mothers Love Orphanage in the capital city of Guangxi known as Nanning. A Mothers Love is a phenominal place. They only take abandoned children with special needs. A number of orphans with severe needs are housed at the orphanage. Those with minor special needs are placed in a foster home. Xiao Ning was immediately placed in the foster home of a wonderful family we call "Uncle" and "Ah-moo." Xiao Ning was well taken care of by them. She was loved deeply as well.

While she waited, we went on with our life with four children. Scripture talks about the "fields of the fatherless" in the Old Testament. Land owners would leave a portion of their grain for the widows and orphans. Travelling to China to get Lily was a "walking in the fields of the fatherless" experience for us. We felt called to return. Although we were very happy with the agency we used to adopt Lily, we decided to use another agency that offered a better financial deal in the adoption process. A Helping Hand is a wonderful agency out of Lexington, Kentucky. They are Christ-centered in their committment to work in adoption and orphan relief in countries that do not permit adoptions. We decided go the same route as we did for Lily.....nonspecial needs, as young as possible, girl. When we neared the completion of our dossier, I felt led to look into the new special needs children that were assigned by the Chinese Center for Adoption Affairs to our new agency....A Helping Hand. We saw Gods hand in this process immediately as we looked at the sweet face of Min Xiao Ning! We changed the necessary paperwork and requested to adopt Xiao Ning. We travelled this past May to bring her home.

We have given her the name "Sarah Jo XiaoNing Alexander." We chose Sarah because it was the name of my grandmother on my mothers side. Mom always mentioned that she wished she had a grand-daughter named "Sarah." Several grand-daughters along the way and no "Sarah." Lily was almost a Sarah! Little did we know that God had other plans for a Sarah to be in the family! "Jo" is my middle name. We also gave her a second middle name...her given Chinese name.

While in China, we had the opportunity to meet Sarah's foster family. They did a wonderful job taking care of her and loving her. I will always remember the embrace of Ah-moo as she spoke the only English words she knew, "I love you." We both had sobbed as we met that day.

We have been home with Sarah for nearly five months. We all feel as if we've known her forever! What is her personality like? Well, she is SOMETHING else! She is strong-willed. She is loving....when she wants to be! She is extremely bright and she speaks English amazingly well already. She's beautiful. She is determined. She loves all sorts of foods. She loves her brothers. She loves Lily, too. Although, she has been a bit mean to Lily as she has bitten sweet Lily at least 30 times since we've been home! I think we have been "bite-free" for nearly two weeks now! Her favorite people would be Eesie, Addi, Lorissa, eye-ee (Auntie in Mandarin) that lives behind us and eye-ees daughter Sydney.

Sarah experienced a lot of grief and she transitioned from her foster family to ours. She has attached well in this time with us. She used to sleep with the foster mother so her bedtime has been a huge transition. She slept on a mattress on our floor for a number of weeks. She is now in her room with Lily, but I have to lay on the floor until she falls asleep. We'll tackle one challenge at a time.

Something that has touched my heart with Sarah is watching her grow in her knowledge of God. She is only two years old, but is amazing how she has grown. Most children born into a Christian home learn early on to fold their hands and pray before a meal. They learn early on that prayer is part of the bed-time routine. I'm pretty confident that Sarah did not hear the name "Jesus" at all before we got her. For a number of weeks she just sat there when we prayed. It is now a moving experience to see her fold her hands and pray at meal times. It is even a more moving experience to see her on her knees at the side of her bed at night as she prays. I kneel with one of my girls on each side of me! We pray. And if I forget someone, she'll remind me! I then take the hands of my little China daughters and we sing "Jesus Loves Me."

Her heart? The VSD is still there, but it is so small that the doctors at Children's do not want to do anything more than see her every six months. Praise God! So, you've met the Seventh Alexander. When you look at her photos, you'll agree that "GOD IS CERTAINLY GOOD!"

Photos: At the bottom is the first photo we saw of Min Xiao Ning. Above that is Gotcha Day in Nanning. Above that is a picture of Sarah's finding spot on "The Forever Wishes" bridge. Above that is Sarah with her foster family and her forever family. Next is the first meeting of Lily and Sarah Alexander. We then have a close up of Sarah in the summer. The portrait photo is of Sarah on her second birthday. She is wearing a dress that was given to her from Ah-moo. The final picture is of Sarah on a water slide at Kings Island.

Before I introduce you to the Sixth and Seventh Alexander, let me share my thoughts on adoption.....

The question is asked of us often, “Why have you adopted?” The simple answer is “It was in Gods plan.”

Adopting TJ was a simple response to our inability to get pregnant and wanting to start a family. It was in Gods plan. Adopting Lily was a simple response to my desire to have a daughter and it made sense to go somewhere where the girls available for adoption were plenty because of governmental and cultural beliefs. Adopting Sarah was a simple response to having “been to the fields of the fatherless (in reference to Deuteronomy 24:19) and wanting to return and bring another Chinese orphan into a forever family.

Family Life states, “The number of children worldwide without families to love and care for them is overwhelming. There are 5.5 million orphans in Africa, 3.5 million orphans in Asia, 1.5 million orphans in Eastern Europe, 400,000 orphans in Latin America, and 135,000 children available for adoption through the US foster care system.”

James 1:27 reads,”Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress.”

One in three Russian orphanage “graduates” is homeless, one in five commits a crime, and one in ten commits suicide. That meant that in 1993, of the 15,000 orphans who “graduated” from Russian orphanages, 1500 committed suicide that year.

India has more than 18 million children living on the streets. Two in five babies entering the orphanage system in China die.

21,616 immigrant visas were issued to orphans coming the United State for adoption in 2003, up from 7,377 a decade earlier (US census Bureau)

In 2004, nearly 7000 babies were adopted from China by US families, 11 of those children are special friends to our Lily since they were placed in the arms of their forever families in the same room on the same day at the same moment that our Lily was placed in our arms. (November 1, 2004)

So, why adopt?

I apologize for not having the reference to the following bullets, but the thoughts that follow are mine.
· God is the creator of life. Every child born and unborn has been created in His image and is of great value and worth to our Creator God. I am a pro-life supporter because of this worth God has placed on His creation. If I am pro-life than I must be pro-adoption.
· Adoption is good for a child. Through adoption, a child gets to live in a forever home with a mother and a father. Through the adoption into a Christian family, these children are introduced to the loving embrace of Jesus Christ and have the opportunity to get to know Him personally.

I coordinate the efforts of a new ministry at our church called “Forever Families Adoption Ministry.” We have made the following statements as part of our ministry in regards to the role adoption plays in the life of our local church.

· Evangelize the lost. Adoption is evangelism at its core….bringing the mission field home, where children are loved, cared for, and discipled to know Jesus Christ as their Savior.
· Edify the saved. FFAM challenges, encourages, and enables believers to put their faith into action, by stepping out in faith to adopt (fulfilling God’s commands in scripture).
· Minister to those in need. There are millions of children waiting to feel loved and cared for as well as many families who would like to adopt them, but just can’t because of the financial barrier. By meeting the physical, spiritual, and emotional needs of children through orphan care or adoption, FFAM helps to rescue those children who are trapped in the cycle of orphan life. FFAM offers adoption grants to qualifying families within the life of Fairfield Christian Church.
· Be a Conscience in the community. As Fairfield Christian Church becomes obedient to God’s commands concerning the fatherless, the community will see Jesus Christ is alive and working in the lives of His people to care for those children who can’t care for themselves.

Besides being used to help in adoptions, it is the hope of FFAM to also reach out in orphan relief to children in countries that never support adoption. This is obedience to the word of God.

So, why adopt?

My final comments will be reserved as I share later in the stories behind the Sixth and Seventh Alexander and how they came to be part of the Seven Alexanders.

The Sixth Alexander

Gotcha Day!
Referral Photos















Well, please don't think I love this little girl more than I love my boys simply because I posted more pictures of her! I couldn't decide which photos to post so I posted more!

This is the Sixth Alexander, Lily Kathrine XiaoJing Alexander. We gave her the name "Lily" simply because we liked it, but I can't help but think of the Scripture when Jesus talks about "consider the Lillies...." I know He had a hand on her little life long before we got our hands on her! The middle name "Kathrine" is the name of a very good friend of mine so I thought it would be nice to give Lily the name of someone that has been special to me for a number of years. "Xiao" was the first name given to Lily at her orphanage and it means, "Little or tiny." "Jing" was the middle name given to her and it means, "crystal."

In December 2003 we made the committment to adopt a little girl from China. Little did we know at the time we made the decision to be obedient to Gods calling on our lives, a little girl was two months old laying in a crib in China...on a wood plank....just waiting for someone to come and get her.

Lily was born on November 17th, 2003 in Yangjiang City, Guangdong Province, Peoples Republic of China. On the day she was born, her birthfamily wrapped her up in a towel and placed her outside of the gate of the Yangjiang Social Welfare Institute. I believe she was deeply loved by her birthfamily. In all liklihood, they didn't know what else they could do with their little girl. Maybe they had other children and having another one would place them over the permitted number of children allowed by the government. Maybe they wanted a boy because culturally there is such a deep-rooted need for families to have sons and they were victims of that cultural struggle. I don't know. What I do know is that they took a risk. Abandoning a child in China is against the law. Lily's family got as close to the orphanage as they possibly could. And like Mariam who hid to watch her little brother(Moses) float in a basket on a river to the safe arms of another woman, I like to think that someone who deeply loved my little girl, hid to watch the security guard of the orphanage safely take her into his arms that morning.

We recieved our referral packet in early September of 2004. One of the photos above was in our referral information. We were set to leave in late October of that same year. We spent a few days touring China with our new friends from FTIA, the agency we used to adopt Lily. There were 12 families in our group. All families were getting girls from the same province. Nine of the girls were from Yangjiang, like Lily. These folks will be forever friends to our family since the twelve girls share a special bond. We call them "Lily's China Sisters." We have had two reunions since our return. One of the posted photos is of our last reunion.

We got Lily on November 1st. I've posted some Gotcha Day photos. That was an awesome day! For so long she was the ends to a long paperchasing endeavor...no face or name. When the referral came it became so different. She now had a face, a name, and we knew where she was. It was eight weeks or so before we could travel to get her. Those eight weeks were extremely long as we looked over every iota of every picture we had of her. To love a person without having had the opportunity to meet or to touch is an amazing thing! She wasn't an orphan in China any longer. She was our little girl. We couldn't wait to have our Gotcha Day with her! We were so anxious because we didn't know how she would do with us. She did rather well with us even though she was not physically feeling well. There is so much to our China journery to Lily that I don't know what to write about and what to skip. At nearly 12 months of age, Lily could not sit up on her own. She couldn't eat food since she had only known a bottle up to that point. She caught up rather quickly on all of the developmental delays. From day one though...she could love. She has captured the hearts of her three brothers. They all three love her deeply. I prayed that she and TJ would have a special bond since they were both brought to our families through the process of adoption. God answered that prayer. Going to China was a good experience. Once there and home, you forget all of the struggles of paperwork, travel, risky foods and the challenging job of transitioing to being home with a new one. It isn't long and you find yourself thinking about going back and getting one more child that needs a forever family. Us? We din't wait long at all!

Lily is now nearly three years old! She is beautiful....even with the short haircut as a result of mom not watching her closely one day when she had a pair of scissors! Her favorite foods are french fries, noodles, chicken (if it is fried), yogurt, apples and bananas. Her favorite activities are anything involving Eesie, Addi or Lorissa. She has proven to be a great older sister. She didn't have the opportunity to get a "baby" sister...one that she could hold or rock. She got a sister just three inches shorter, a few pounds lighter, and eight months younger. Lily's world was rocked when the Seventh Alexander came her way. She has done well....even though she has been bitten a good 25 times by this intruder she knows as her little sister. Lily has a beautiful heart. Today at the store, Sarah got in trouble for being mean to Lily in the cart. I chose to not let Sarah ride in the cart with Lily and carried the crying little sister through the store. She cried all the way home....screamed actually. When we got home, Lily said, "You are being mean to Mei Mei." In Mandarin, "mei mei" means "little sister." Lily loves her Mei Mei.

As for the pictures above: I'll start from the bottom pictures and make my way up. The bottom photo is the first photo we received from China in September of 2004. The one above it is an updated photo of Lily just before we travelled to get her. Two of the next photos above that are of Gotcha Day. To the left of the Gotcha Day photo of Lily with me is an early photo of Lily at home. Yes, she still sucks her thumb! Above that are two Easter photos from this year. Nest isT is a recent photo of her on her favorite horse. Last, but not least, is the photo of Lily's China Sisters at our last reunion. We are approaching our second anniversary of Gotcha Day, November 1st. Has it only been two years? We all feel like we've known her and have loved her much longer than that. God has certainly been good!